Waiting on purpose.

My 30s have been amazing so far – the best decade yet! I had no idea it would be like this after the tumultuous 20s. Careers are more stable. Personalities have settled in. People in their 30s have started to get a handle on the adult thing. Most of my friends have gotten married and are having babies and it’s fun to see them grow and mature in new ways. Life is wonderful. I appreciate it in all its fullness with an understanding based on experience and a still child-like wonder.

Don’t get me wrong – there’s still a lot I’m looking forward to. More adventures, more romance, more laughs, more struggles, more opportunities to pour into others.

I pray this ‘more’ also includes a husband and family of my own one day. Cause, honestly, I’m not sure I would have planned things out this way. People will say, “what are you waiting for?” or “don’t wait too long.” Have you ever gotten the “how come you’re not married yet – you’re so great” combo? Humans ask the oddest things.

I have this immense hope in the life God has planned for me. Psalm 27: 13-14 says, I believe I shall see the Lord’s goodness in the land of the living. Wait on the Lord; be courageous, and strengthen your heart, and wait on the Lord. (Shoutout to my friend Apple who so beautifully reminded me of this verse recently!) There are so many things on my heart – things put there by God – I know he’s being patient with me. He wants me to be the best steward possible for his blessings.

I’m waiting on purpose.

Everything prepares us for what’s next. In every moment God is using our situation to help us get better. I sometimes look back over my experiences and marvel at how God’s timing and plan brings us right where we need to be with the tools we’ll need to use. I also sometimes forget, feeling like I’m treading water with nothing in sight. Why not yet? Why not now? Why me? Waiting can be a struggle, even more so when we allow ourselves to take our eyes off God. St. John Chrysostom said, “God has not forgotten the man to whom he sends suffering and trials, but in this way is proving his closeness to him.” There is a purpose to it all.

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